Trevor's grandma who lives in Michigan visited us yesterday. Hoo-eee, that woman is a spitfire! She says whatever is on her mind, and damn it's cool. She's in her mid-eighties, and she still has all her own teeth, is svelte, does her hair and makeup, paints and reads voraciously, volunteers in the church thrift store, and shovels her own snow in the winter. The woman looks the same as when I first met her 15 years ago. Her secrets? Wear sunscreen, don't eat high fructose corn syrup, and stretch every day.

And here I am hunting virgins and relying on the slim hope to be taken to David J and Kevin Haskins' alien planet where no one ages past 35. What am I doing?

NP: Roni Size (Reprazent), New Forms. Damn this is a good album. This is the kind of drums and bass that I never tire of. It has gotten me through many a workday, including this one.