Sunday, June 29, 2008

Okay, so y'all know I've been seeing a new acupuncturist who is giving me something that smells and tastes like pee pee to drink for part of my treatment.

What y'all don't know is that I'm also on a detox diet for the duration of this treatment. I am supposed to abstain from:

sugar
caffeine
alcohol
beef
pork
fried food
rich food
spicy food

And, it goes w/o saying -- my occasional yummy Nat Sherman.

Which, you know, pretty much means abstaining from MY LIFE.

But the funny thing is, the tea I drink twice a day actually helps me not crave this stuff. And I've lost 5 pounds. So it's all good, right?

You would think so.

Today we went to a poetry reading at McNally's, home of the best damn Guinness pour this side of the Bay. And good god, I almost cried because I couldn't have one.

So, today, an ode -- to all the foods I've loved before:

Alcohol:


















Sugar (my ultimate chocolate bar):


















Rich and Fried and Pork (homemade pork gyoza at Rikyu):














Caffeine (Blue Bottle espresso):














Sigh.

Where's the spicy food? Forget it -- that one actually hurts too much to post anything. I regularly eat so much spicy stuff that the evidence would just be a picture of me with a big grin. So sad.

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8 Comments:

Blogger LAS said...

Ummmmm, how long is this for? Does this mean no whiskey bar when I come to visit in t-minus four weeks? RUH ROH?

June 30, 2008 at 3:55:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Ammie said...

Oh no my friend -- even if he still has me eating twigs and drinking pisswater the color of night, exceptions will be made.

Can't wait to see you!

June 30, 2008 at 4:19:00 PM PDT  
Blogger LAS said...

WORD.

June 30, 2008 at 5:27:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Willard said...

Speaking of food, I worked at watercourse in Denver.. in fact I lived a few steps away from it. Best food, worst kitchen ever.
I'm curious as to how the Acupuncture works for you. I'm using Acupressure currently to deal with a little panic problem. (rendered little by the acu, and meditation) It works. and I'm not going to research as to why, since I don't want to burst the bubble of belief, in any case.
Eastern plus western, I meditate with binaural beats, using a mantra. Salivation worked via bell for Pavlov, so why not relaxation via mantra for me?

Clarissa Barnette. That's the cutest job on earth. wow.

July 1, 2008 at 9:40:00 AM PDT  
Blogger LAS said...

uhhhhhhhhh. craig. what exactly is wrong with the kitchen at watercourse?! i need to know. actually, maybe i just need to know if it's safe to eat the bana bread french toast.

July 1, 2008 at 3:29:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Eric Baus said...

I am currently drinking a hot mug of my own twig/pee concoction.

Is your acupuncturist allowing you to open your eyes, breathe, or poop?

July 1, 2008 at 4:08:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Ammie said...

Eric, those are the only things I get to do. Thank you (really!) for getting me on the peepee tea track.

Craig, the acupuncture combined with massage not of this world is helping loads. Meditation is something I would like to try, but I am too mind speed-racer (which is why I should do it -- ahh, the circle of life).

And I got food poisoning at Watercourse at breakfast, so I am with you brother! But I will still eat there again. That homemade tempeh is divine.

July 1, 2008 at 4:40:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Willard said...

As for the Watercourse kitchen:

It was three levels stacked atop each other, each the size of a postage stamp, and separated by ladders. The top level, the attic, was the equipment storage. The Bottom level, the basement, contained the walk-in cooler. It was tricky to balance a box of vegetables on ones head with one hand and negotiate the greasy ladder with the other hand.
There are other things, but that's enough to qualify it as one of the most dangerous jobs on earth.

(1)Crab boat fisherman, 2)Elizabeth Taylor's colon therapist 3)Watercourse cook

No doubt, something growing on the attic ceiling fell into your breakfast in the course of cooking it. Much of the cuisine is grown on the walls and scraped off into the pots, as it is. The Seitan is a compound formed int he mortar cracks between the tiles. It's constitution is a mystery, but presumably 100% natural.

July 4, 2008 at 7:12:00 AM PDT  

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