The Freakonomics blog at the New York Times posted an interesting bit today, about The Economist's debate on the commodification of water.

At The Economist debate site, pro is supplied by Steve Hoffmann, Managing Director, WaterTech Capital & co-founder, Palisades Water Index Associates. Con is provided by Vandana Shiva, Director, Research Foundation for Science, Technology & Natural Resource Policy.

Hmmm, excuse me for being skeptical of the shameless frat boys that make up the free market at a time like this, but judging merely by the titles, I do have an instant gut feeling of who I should trust!

While I agree that water supplies would probably, in theory, be better "managed" were market rates applied (definition of managed being fluid depending on which "market" you were talking to), Hoffman's attempt to play the social justice card -- by offering first thing that the beneficiaries of said (safer, more consistent, more abundant) water supplies would be folks who are underserved in the first place -- make me not only suspicious, but a bit queasy.

To wit, let's ask something that makes this perfectly clear: what have corporate interests done for YOU lately? Especially one that is a "merchant and investment banking firm that specializes in serving the myriad of companies that...comprise the water industry?" When has big business cared about whether the needs of not only the underserved but our ecosystems are being met, especially if they don't have a voice to the tune of millions of dollars?

From Vandana Shiva's abstract:

When water's social and ecological values are ignored and markets determine how water flows, it starts to move against the law of gravity. It moves upwards – to money – from the poor to the rich, from agriculture to industry, from the countryside to the city. In water markets, water moves from having a high ecological and social value, but a low market value, to having a low ecological and social value, but a high market value.

Water markets take water from where it is needed by nature’s economy, people’s economy and the countryside, to where there is purchasing power for water as a commodity—the urban areas, industry and industrial agriculture. Managing a scarce and precious resource like water requires conservation, equity and the recognition that as the basis of life, water is priceless.

Water, a neccesity for all of Earth's life, should not be corralled to serve the greed of the free market.

Boy, we're really getting the hang of this genome thing, eh? Jeebus.

So very very close to the only thing my friend wants out of stuff like this: a plant that produces meat products, or more colloquially, a chicken bush. Really, that's all he wants.

I got a text-to-landline message on my answering machine today from John, voiced by a computer program.

I was so impressed, and then I realized, no, I am so 20th century.

When I read things like this I want to seriously move far away from the Bay Area to a cabin in the woods and never come out.

Spa camp? For children? Is this for real? Or is it something conjured up by Fox News to make the Bay Area look even more insane?

"This class is good for little kids because they need to relax more," [Maggie, 6], said, lifting her handmade lavender-scented eye mask for an interview. She said her anxiety comes from arguments with her parents over going to bed when she wants to stay up and read her mystery books. Another stressor is struggling with new tasks, like washing the dishes.

"I can do it for like 15 minutes, then I start feeling like I can't, and I have to take a five-minute break. I use that method to get through it," she said.

Sorry sweetie, but your parents telling you what to do isn't something that facilitates being so stressed that you need self-indulgence reserved for adults with real stress in order to deal. I hope this is being conveyed to her; otherwise, this is just nurturing psychosis around normal childhood. You know what works well for kids (and some adults too?) Get off the Wii and go outside. Jump around. Make mud pies. Eat ice cream. Anything but wallow in how much you need pampering and a eye pillow at age 6.

But you know, I bet life is a real bitch if your parents send you to spa camp. I can only assume any 6 year-old having her normal anxieties pandered to like they're going to destroy her is not getting modeling nor encouragement of healthy coping mechanisms in the first place. Poor thing's gonna prolly need therapy to deal with the injustice of real life -- that you can't take a 5 minute break every 15 minutes when you have responsibilities. Never mind the cruelty that is learning new tasks and adapting successfully without needing shiatsu or a lavender sachet at every turn.

It is utter shite like this that makes me truly feel like we're devolving.

And y'all just know leviathans and such are marking time until that happens, when they will flood the earth and take over, and we'll all be screwed. Man, that's when we'll need those killer robots to do battle for us. Hope the humans that end up with the "technology over all" part of human devolvement get those suckers online in time.

Um, anyway...spa camp for kids bad! :)

Hell in an infernal handbasket. For real, yo.

HOWEVER...if the killer robots can successfully battle anything we DNA scramble or create from scratch that might try to Deep Blue Sea our asses -- wow, what a blessing in disguise! Even Steven.

BUT...if that scenario just doesn't quite work out (but really, T, what could happen?), there are a few current events one may take comfort in before our imminent self-destruct at the hands of mad scientists.

1) Yummy and brilliant Edward Norton will be The Hulk. Tim "the English Edward Norton" Roth will be the Abomination.

2) Hellboy, Darkness Calls. This 6-parter drawn by Duncan Fegredo and penned by Mr. Mignola is rocking my world. Just finished numero tres. The undead army panels, Baba Yaga/Perun, and Hellboy finally getting to spill his cwazy adventures to a sympathetic Russian house spirit are just some of the delights that await you.

3) Rescue Dawn, this month! Not only is this film one of the few non-documentaries that Werner Herzog has directed in the new millenium, but hello, Christian Bale. And Herzog on location, in the jungle once again. Sweet. He can push his actors to the limit because it is not only he who requires it, but the environment. That can only mean one thing: quality.

4) My birthday is coming up! I see a massage and pedicure, caramel apples and saltwater taffy, a deserted weekday beach and arcade, and numerous rides on the Giant Dipper in my future.